Forgiveness is something we all encounter at one time or another in both directions, giving and receiving. This was an important part of Jesus ministry and is subject of one of his sacraments. If we know and realize that love is an important part of relationships and of our relationship with God, we can hopefully realize the importance of forgiveness. To quickly understand, let us look at a married couple in love. It is inevitable in living that two people living together are going to have disagreements and arguments as a normal course of living. But truly, living out their lives involves give and take and forgiving slights and differences, even large ones. Forgiveness is not a one time thing, but an integral part of life and love and relationships. Forgiveness looks to the future and has its own way of putting behind what was the dispute. To say, “I’ll forgive but never forget,” is not Christian and certainly not what we ourselves ask when we ask forgiveness. I ask where would we be if God himself said he would not forget? Yet the words of the sacrament are “I absolve you of all your sins.” His love is unconditional and so should ours be.
Each of us knows the weakness and failure that sometimes only we know and the many times we ask for forgiveness for our actions. This access to forgiveness we seek, is something we should be prepared to give and share to those who in any way need our forgiveness as we live our daily lives.
24th Sunday in Ordinary Time, 9-17-17 Sirach 27:30-28:7, Ps 103:1-12, Romans 14:7-9, Matthew 18: 21-35
We use the word “forgiveness” at every single Mass. Let’s spend a few minutes talking about what forgiveness is, and is not.
Let’s start with what forgiveness is not. Forgiveness is not forgetting, like Christians are a group of people with voluntary memory loss. Forgiveness is not reconciliation. To reconcile means to establish a friendship or shared understanding of something; to come to agreement. Forgiveness is not condoning. When we condone an act, we simply overlook it without protest. Likewise, forgiveness is not dismissing. When a court case is dismissed, the legal action is withdrawn and nothing else is done. Forgiveness is not some vague sort of tolerance. Tolerance is when we allow or respect something as permissible. Finally, forgiveness is not pardoning. When the governor pardons someone in jail, he releases them without further punishment, he excuses their crime.
Most of us, including myself, would have used one or more of these words to define “forgiveness.” But we would have been wrong. Forgiveness is not about excuses or overlooking or tolerating or withdrawing. One dictionary definition I like is “to renounce anger or resentment against.” It is a decision to not carry negative emotion against something some one else did. It is not a judgment but rather a decision about our own behavior. It is not something we create, but something we learn from the Spirit of God. Our relationship with God shows us that we can be loved even when we are at our worst. This discovery is so enormous that we want to pass it on to others.
For starters, forgiveness is gift from God; it is an act of faith. Two very familiar scriptures might help. First, is Matthew 18:22, when Peter asks Jesus how many times he must forgive a brother and, I suspect, tries to appear generous by suggesting 7 times. Jesus responds, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times.” Please understand that the number “7” is the number for complete or finished, or even perfect. That’s why creation in Genesis is a “7” day event. Peter thinks if he forgave seven times, it would be perfect. Jesus tells him that he must multiply his answer by 10, and then add another 7 for even more perfect. What? It means infinite, limitless, endless. That must have taken the wind out of Peter’s sail, as it does mine. Incidentally, that 77 is a direct quote, using the exact same Greek phrase, from Genesis 4: 24, and is referring to limits on revenge against Cain for the murder of his brother. Jesus is talking about unlimited forgiveness- of a terrible crime. This is what brings peace to our families, our communities, and our world.
The other familiar scripture is the Our Father, Matthew 6: 14-15. “If you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your transgressions.” It sends a chill up my spine every time I say it. It’s very clear. Can we say, “Of course we are forgiven; Christ’s death on the cross forgave my sins,” and still not forgive others? There are many Bible verses that respond very clearly to that. One is Colossians 3: 12-13, “Put on, then, as God’s chosen ones, holy & beloved, heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if one has a grievance against another; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must do also.”
Forgiveness is one of the most powerful actions a Christian can perform. The only thing harder than forgiveness – is to not forgive. To not forgive is like carrying a brick around with you, every day, always, everywhere. To forgive is to set a prisoner free, and then find out that the prisoner is not someone else, but yourself. And to not forgive tends to grow into something even more ugly. If we are angry and hold a grudge against one person, we are likely to begin to generalize that anger to other people. Ethnic hatred and racism, for example, are often based in anger against one individual or event.
We may say we will “try” to forgive people. Here I need to quote a famous movie character, Yoda, in Star Wars. Yoda said, “Try not! Do or do not! There is no try!” When we try, we leave open an expectation of possible failure; better to decide to do. Forgiveness is not wimpy; instead it tends to be an attribute of strength and confidence.
C.S. Lewis wrote, “Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea until we have something to forgive.” It might be well to look at forgiveness as purposeful commitment or a jouney. A therapist, when writing about forgiveness, suggested that forgiveness is a long-term plan, and may require a wait 10 or more years before the other party is willing to respond. He urges people to continue to make regular contract for however long it takes.
The tragedy of the 2006 Amish schoolhouse shooting in Pennsylvania will always be with me. When a man entered a schoolhouse and killed 5 little girls, the Amish families not only offered forgiveness but also food, help and friendship to the shooter’s wife and children. They did it because they knew the Gospel, not to look good. They had a firm commitment to obey the Word of God, knowing that, despite the pain and trauma in their lives, it was the right thing to do, and it was that choice that would restore love and peace. It was a powerful witness to the world. We also have that choice available to us.
So we can boldly say, “I will show Christ’s love by forgiving those who do not even ask for forgiveness. I will leave fairness and justice in God’s hands. I will forgive others just as the Lord forgave me. Today I will give myself the gift of forgiveness. ” Is there someone I need to forgive?
23rd Sunday Ordinary time, 9-10-17; Ezekiel 33:7-9; Psalm: 95:1-2, 6-9; Romans 13:8-10; Matthew 18:15-2
We have been reading in the 4th section of Matthew, which discusses the Kingdom of God and the Church. It focuses on the care and respect that believers must have for each other; we must guard each other’s faith with correction, seek out the lost, and forgive each other. Unfortunately, the lectionary chops up Jesus’ discourse. Let’s take a quick look at the three paragraphs just before our reading so we can be centered in the discussion.
First, the disciples ask, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” Jesus’ response: “Whoever humbles himself like (a) child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” This deflates our egos quickly when we remember what limited value was put on children then, especially girls. Greatness is not about power or prestige.
Next, Jesus warns the disciples: “Whoever causes one of these little ones (the humble) who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone hug around his neck and to be drowned in the…sea.” That image is worth a thousand words.
Just before our reading is the parable of the Lost Sheep. Jesus’ own recap: “It is not the will of our heavenly Father that one of these little (humble) ones be lost.” You can hear a theme of the value to God of the individual, especially the humble and those of seemingly “Little Value”. There are thousands of “lost” people within a couple of miles of our church! “Lost” can be translated as lacking the necessities of life, or treated as worthless, or as unaware of God’s love.
Today our Gospel reading is about Jesus telling us how to function with each other in a church community. Why? Jesus was Jewish. They didn’t have churches; they had synagogues and the temple. Jesus never, at any time recorded in the scriptures, told his followers to start “a church”. Some theologians suggest that Jesus was beginning to realize that at some time his teachings would cause a separation from the Jewish faith.
Others suggest that the growing antagonism between the followers of Jesus and the Jews was due to other political, social, and economic reasons, along with general human hard-heartedness. Remember that the Jews had several internal sects that were in armed rebellion against Roman rule, and that the Romans, completely fed up with them, destroyed the temple, along with much of Jerusalem in the year 70 c.e. A lot was going on in the first century, and one part can’t really be separated from the rest of the story.
But we also have evidence that Matthew’s faith community was having the kind of problems that many faith communities have. There were some people doing things that annoyed others, things that were counter to Jewish and/or Christian morals, things that were disruptive, or stole the attention away from the faith.
The teachings we read today are ones that Jesus may have spoken as admonishment to the apostles, and served Matthew’s pastoral needs. They are based on well-known Jewish scriptures in Leviticus19: 17, “You shall not bear hatred for your brother in your heart. Though you may have to reprove your fellow man, do not incur sin because of him.” Also in Sirach 19:16 “Admonish your neighbor before you break with him; thus will you fulfill the law of the Most High.” Some corporate headquarters did not create this type of process to settle disputes; it’s been around a long time.
Gerald Darring, a long-time Catholic theologian, professor, catechist, and author of many books, has written this better than I can, so I will quote him, “We are a church, an assembly of people gathered to do the work of God. This work brings us together around the table of the Lord and sends us out to renew the face of the earth. The task that faces us in the world is awesome, and the obstacles are formidable. The only way we can succeed is by staying together, with Jesus in our midst, and our staying together must involve community efforts to correct our faults. When there is racism or sexism in our church, we must confront them and work to eliminate them. When economic injustice is found…, we must speak out against it and work to eliminate it. When militarism makes its way into the fabric of our community, we must stand up for peace and proclaim the gospel message of nonviolent change. An essential component of … love should be the help (notice he didn’t say “condemnation”) we give each other in overcoming the shortcomings that get in the way of our becoming a universal sacrament of salvation.”
If you have read, “Why did Jesus, Moses, the Buddha, and Mohammed Cross the Road”, you know that one of the issues stressed in that book is not the faults of other religions, but the faults and darkness that have made their way into our own belief systems. It is challenging to look at the history of our religion and the structure of our religious institutions. If you haven’t read it yet, you still have time. As CACINA Catholics, many of us have already had to face up to some social teachings and practices of other Christian groups which we had found to lead away from Christ. Sometimes someone must be asked to leave; at times some of us have had to leave. The Catholic Apostolic Church in North America’s goal is open discussions as a way to test our beliefs and grow in Godliness.
Today’s gospel is interesting and possibly misunderstood by many who read it. In context, Jesus is instructing his disciples about community. We must remember that in Israel and surrounding areas, the make up of was very tribal or community or family oriented. Within a particular village or town everyone was related in some fashion to others. Everyone knew everyone else and disputes would be worked out with the help of elders if needed. It is very different for Us to understand it completely in a time and different culture. But certainly, Jesus was speaking of reconciliation and the necessity of getting along if we are to follow his command to love one another. In a marriage, hopefully, a couple learns to settle disputes and disagreements before a wall is between them. Certainly this is what Jesus had in mind in saying those offended or offending should seek out and resolve hurts and things harmful to a person or the community. A second step would be to bring in two or three other to help. If that failed then bring it to the community. In many ways this works in a small community and in the early church that Matthew was writing for.
Matthew lived a long time ago and much has happened over the centuries to Christianity. Division, arguments, disagreements, and all other manner of human failure has proven that humans are far from perfect. Despite all this, Christ’s word is still among us and we are still called to live it out as best we can. We are still called to a community of faith and love and living as Jesus called us to do. That is why we as a church, welcome all who come and do not judge but embrace all who want to follow Jesus and journey with us. Let us pray we can invite and lead more to come and follow him.